I gave my last lessons as a coach this afternoon (technically yesterday now). It was all very surreal. JoJo, Pey, and I had a great time in our lessons but I left quickly before I broke down into tears. Then I bawled all the way to the grocery store and walked around like a zombie. Today is the holiday show, and I know I am going to be a disaster.
No matter how prepared I was for this, how right this decision is for our family, or how much I am looking forward to our new little one being born leaving the rink is a difficult thing for me. More difficult than I even anticipated. It is the end of a very long chapter in my life - 20 years! Pretty long considering I've only been alive for 25, almost 26 years.
I'm not sure what the point of this post is, I think it's just a way for me to get my thoughts down since it's after 3 AM and I'm exhausted but my brain is going 100 miles an hour and I can't fall asleep. Peanut is sleeping in our bed right now with her daddy and I'm downstairs on the couch so that I don't wake them.
Hopefully I'll get some sleep tonight.
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